BETWEEN THE LINES

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BAD TRACK RECORDS!

Sarcastic, facetious and downright vicious lyrics, satire, parody and irreverent comment, tosh, twaddle and opinionated verbiage from the townships of East Sussex by artistic layabout Colin Bailey

SARCASTIC, FACETIOUS AND VICIOUS LYRICS, SATIRE, PARODY AND IRREVERENT COMMENT, TOSH, TWADDLE AND OPINIONATED VERBIAGE FROM THE TOWNSHIPS OF EAST SUSSEX BY ARTISTIC LAYABOUT COLIN BAILEY

BETWEEN THE LINES

I met her in Balham

Where her mother ran a salon

That she used to visit once a week

Now she travels miles by tube

Just to get her pubes removed

and to have strange things done to her feet

She was Fabulous, Absolutely!

A shelf maintained beauty

Her presentation was beyond compare

A cosmetically modified specimen

A student of lessons in

The Science of Laboratoire Garnier

You couldn’t take her at face value

You had to dig deep to find the signs

You had to brush away the topsoil

Just to read between the lines

And asked if she was worth it

She emptied out her purse – it

Held powders and potions of every kind.

Her beauty to any beholder

Hung in that bag on her shoulder

Bricking up the passages of time

And you couldn’t really hanker

For a canvas that was blanker

As you watched her take her makeup off at night

And sat there contemplating

The prospect of excavating

This interesting scientific sight

And as you were awaiting

The results of carbon dating

A question nobody dared to ask

What was it that held her

convinced and compelled her

To hide herself so far behind this mask?

In the morning as you trembled

Over coffee she assembled

The pots and jars that were her stock in trade

And with hands of an old master

She ladled on the plaster

A picture no time could ever fade.